Only My Mom Reads My Blog

I found that tiny crochet hook that I was looking for.
Unfortunately it wasn’t found until after I had already bought, and lost, a new one.
I found it while I was packing last night.

Oh yeah, I am packing!
Looks like I am moving again.  Jordan says I can’t stay in one place ever since I tattooed that dandelion blowing in the wind on my body.  Maybe he’s right.

January 29th, 2013

It’s all of the same stuff, in a different room. I could swear that I only closed my eyes for a second and the walls changed around me.  Will this be the place that feels like home? I spent my whole life in one place, and in the past 2 years I’ve moved enough that I could efficiently load my life into a toyota corolla and be somewhere different by morning.  With each move that I make I lose a little bit of that glimmer of excitement that a new adventure brings.  Each move feels like I’m leaving a part of me behind, and I can’t help but wonder how much of me I’ll have left once I’ve settled.

Ironically the more time that I spend here, the more alone I start to feel.  I think I am driving people away by being too real.  There’s something wrong with me.  People here don’t get how I am--who I am. 

I wrote that on my first night I spent in my room, and I’ll write the rest of this on my last.

I have to say this move is filled with glimmer, filled with excitement, and free of fear.  I have such high hopes for this move. The move is going to be one symbolic breath of fresh air, a sigh of relief, a clean slate. This move is going to be good for me, in a big way--trust me.

Tomorrow is painting day, and Sunday is move in day.
Maybe I will post progress pictures.

p.s. love you mom.